[閱讀筆記] 高效能人士的七個習慣 - 主動積極 Habit 1 Be Proactive

中文書名：與成功有約、高效能人士的七個習慣
原文書名：The 7 habits of highly effective people
作者：Stephen Covey
初版日期：1989

本書之基本資料：中文版、英文版(推薦)。

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We are not our feelings.
We are not our moods.
We are not even our thoughts.

我們並不是一時的感受，感受是一種大腦接收到外界訊息得到的初步印象。

我們也不是一時的情緒，情緒是一種大腦狀態，受到外界的刺激所影響，甚至受到飲食、化學物質所影響。

我們甚至也不是一時的想法，想法會持續改變，受到所學習的、所認知的、所記憶的事物的影響，而產生各種想法。

我們擁有主動權，決定自己面對任何情況時所採取的行動，而不是單純依據自己的習慣的作出制約反應。

電影《深夜加油站遇見蘇格拉底》也談到了相同的概念 -- 「大腦只是反射器官， 對所有事物都會產生反應，所以才會整天充滿各種奇怪的思緒，但這些想法完全不代表你的為人」。

THE SOCIAL MIRROR

BETWEEN STIMULUS AND RESPONSE

Between stimulus and response, man has the freedom to choose.

在接收到外界刺激後，到做出反應之前，人類有自由意志可以做出選擇！

把握珍貴的自由意志，做出合適的選擇。而不要只是單純的依據習慣、制約反應，而做出沒有深思熟慮的選擇。

要能夠在事件發生的當下，覺知到這個情況，並主動根據有意識的思惟，選擇最恰當的反應，需要有禪修的基礎，才能夠真正做到，也就是要能夠時時刻刻非常明瞭自己當下的思惟及意識。

2011年10月Murphy遇到的例子，在一停車場，離場繳費時，停車費10元，但身上只有1000元鈔票，拿給收費員，收費員口氣很不好，說沒辦法找啦。我可以選擇責問對方，本就該備妥用來找零的錢，但以這種方式處理，對事情並沒有正面的幫助。我選擇到附近購買物品，以找得零錢。回來繳費時，收費員轉變為滿臉笑容，直道歉，拿發票給我時，還誠心地祝我中大獎。

"PROACTIVITY" DEFINED

Proactivity means that as human beings, we are responsible for our own lives.
We have the initiative and the responsibility to make things happen.

我們有責任採取主動，讓事情發生。這和 QBQ 的精神是相通的。

Responsibility - reponse-ability - the ability to choose our response.

Reactive People	Proactive People
behavior is a function of conditions	behavior is a function of decisions
driven by feelings	driven by values
be acted upon	to act
love is a feeling	love is a verb
focus efforts in Circle of Concern	focus efforts in Circle of Influence

 

No one can hurt you without your consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt

They cannot take away our self respect if we do not give it to them.
I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday.
Gandhi

Viktor Frankl:

LISTENING TO OUR LANGUAGE

Reactive Language	Proactive Language
There's nothing I can do.	Let's look at our alternatives.
That's just the way I am.	I can choose a different approach.
He makes me so mad.	I control my own feelings.
They won't allow that.	I can create an effective presentation.
I have to do that.	I will choose an appropriate response.
I can't.	I choose.
I must.	I prefer.
If only.	I will.

 

Reactive language最可怕的問題是，它會成為self-fulling prophecy.

CIRCLE OF CONCERN / CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE

By working on ourselves instead of worrying about conditions, we were able to influence the conditions.

專注在我們能夠做的，如此我們反而能夠發揮影響力，擴大影響力。

DIRECT, INDIRECT, AND NO CONTROL

The proactive approach puts the first step within our present Circle of Influence.

THE OTHER END OF THE STICK

While we are free to choose our actions, we are not free to choose the consequence of those actions.
When we pick up one end of the stick, we pick up the other.

The proactive approach to a mistake is to
acknowledge it instantly,
correct
and learn from it.

雖然我們有自由意志能夠選擇我們要採取的行動，但仍需遵循因果法則，就像蘋果必須遵循萬有引力定律。

我們必須為我們的行為（業）負責。

MAKING AND KEEPING COMMITMENTS

The power to make and keep commitments to ourselves is the essence of developing the basic habits of effectiveness.

知道這些知識是不夠的，只是紙上談兵，需要實際應用，才能夠發揮效用。

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[閱讀筆記] 高效能人士的七個習慣 7 Habits of Highly Effective People